Fighting my place into the world
The world is a big space. We live together with billions of people on this planet. We don’t know most people, while we get in contact with others through our (voluntary) work.
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Some people are acquaintances, some are friends, some are good friends, some are best friends and we have our family. We are human beings with our own character, our own mind and our own tastes. All of this makes us unique in every aspect of our life. This sounds like a cliché, but this cliché is very true.
I think that in this (digital) world, we expect everyone to be perfect. But at the same time, perfect doesn’t exist. What you think is perfect is not perfect for someone else. These differences in perception could be the source of big discussions that will lead nowhere. You can talk about those issues for a long time. Do we ever reach consensus about the term perfect? Or are we ever getting close to what’s being perfect? I don’t think we are!
I think about this subject a lot in the last few years. It makes me feel uncomfortable. At the same; I have to let myself feel what I feel. I have to know why I feel it and maybe do something about it. Or just feel that feeling.
It makes me sad too. Things I imagined in my childhood, that would be perfect in my head, aren’t perfect. It’s just a fantasy, I think. A fantasy about how I think the world should be, how life should be or how I want the world to look like. This imaginary picture all fell down in pieces.
Things happened in my life of which I wasn’t aware of at the moment they happened and only now I start to realize this and think about them. I have no trust in human beings anymore. People let me down! I also let down myself: I let people in I shouldn’t let in, in…